Accepting Help

W

Wheezie

New member
Part of getting sicker, which is inevitable for us, is accepting that we can't do as much as we once could. And part of accepting THAT, is learning how to accept help. Your roommate that's doing all this cleaning you said is a really close friend of yours, too. I bet part of it is his cleanliness obsession, but I bet a bigger part is that he wants to help you. If you've talked to him about it, but he still insists on doing the work, you have to know that it's not a reflection of you, but rather a reflection of him and his choices.

Also, you said that you sometimes feel like a person who isn't working up to their capabilities is bad. I agree that we should all do the best we possibly can, but if you tire more easily and/or faster than you used to, it seems to me that you're not really NOT working to the best of your capabilities - you ARE doing the best you can; you just can't do as much as you once could. It's not a bad thing and you're not a bad person. And you shouldn't push yourself to do more than is healthy for you, just to 'prove' yourself.

If your roommate and friend says he doesn't resent you, I say take him at his word. And may I reiterate once again how much I love your name? <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-happy.gif" border="0">
 
W

Wheezie

New member
Part of getting sicker, which is inevitable for us, is accepting that we can't do as much as we once could. And part of accepting THAT, is learning how to accept help. Your roommate that's doing all this cleaning you said is a really close friend of yours, too. I bet part of it is his cleanliness obsession, but I bet a bigger part is that he wants to help you. If you've talked to him about it, but he still insists on doing the work, you have to know that it's not a reflection of you, but rather a reflection of him and his choices.

Also, you said that you sometimes feel like a person who isn't working up to their capabilities is bad. I agree that we should all do the best we possibly can, but if you tire more easily and/or faster than you used to, it seems to me that you're not really NOT working to the best of your capabilities - you ARE doing the best you can; you just can't do as much as you once could. It's not a bad thing and you're not a bad person. And you shouldn't push yourself to do more than is healthy for you, just to 'prove' yourself.

If your roommate and friend says he doesn't resent you, I say take him at his word. And may I reiterate once again how much I love your name? <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-happy.gif" border="0">
 
W

Wheezie

New member
Part of getting sicker, which is inevitable for us, is accepting that we can't do as much as we once could. And part of accepting THAT, is learning how to accept help. Your roommate that's doing all this cleaning you said is a really close friend of yours, too. I bet part of it is his cleanliness obsession, but I bet a bigger part is that he wants to help you. If you've talked to him about it, but he still insists on doing the work, you have to know that it's not a reflection of you, but rather a reflection of him and his choices.

Also, you said that you sometimes feel like a person who isn't working up to their capabilities is bad. I agree that we should all do the best we possibly can, but if you tire more easily and/or faster than you used to, it seems to me that you're not really NOT working to the best of your capabilities - you ARE doing the best you can; you just can't do as much as you once could. It's not a bad thing and you're not a bad person. And you shouldn't push yourself to do more than is healthy for you, just to 'prove' yourself.

If your roommate and friend says he doesn't resent you, I say take him at his word. And may I reiterate once again how much I love your name? <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-happy.gif" border="0">
 
W

Wheezie

New member
Part of getting sicker, which is inevitable for us, is accepting that we can't do as much as we once could. And part of accepting THAT, is learning how to accept help. Your roommate that's doing all this cleaning you said is a really close friend of yours, too. I bet part of it is his cleanliness obsession, but I bet a bigger part is that he wants to help you. If you've talked to him about it, but he still insists on doing the work, you have to know that it's not a reflection of you, but rather a reflection of him and his choices.

Also, you said that you sometimes feel like a person who isn't working up to their capabilities is bad. I agree that we should all do the best we possibly can, but if you tire more easily and/or faster than you used to, it seems to me that you're not really NOT working to the best of your capabilities - you ARE doing the best you can; you just can't do as much as you once could. It's not a bad thing and you're not a bad person. And you shouldn't push yourself to do more than is healthy for you, just to 'prove' yourself.

If your roommate and friend says he doesn't resent you, I say take him at his word. And may I reiterate once again how much I love your name? <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-happy.gif" border="0">
 
W

Wheezie

New member
Part of getting sicker, which is inevitable for us, is accepting that we can't do as much as we once could. And part of accepting THAT, is learning how to accept help. Your roommate that's doing all this cleaning you said is a really close friend of yours, too. I bet part of it is his cleanliness obsession, but I bet a bigger part is that he wants to help you. If you've talked to him about it, but he still insists on doing the work, you have to know that it's not a reflection of you, but rather a reflection of him and his choices.
<br />
<br />Also, you said that you sometimes feel like a person who isn't working up to their capabilities is bad. I agree that we should all do the best we possibly can, but if you tire more easily and/or faster than you used to, it seems to me that you're not really NOT working to the best of your capabilities - you ARE doing the best you can; you just can't do as much as you once could. It's not a bad thing and you're not a bad person. And you shouldn't push yourself to do more than is healthy for you, just to 'prove' yourself.
<br />
<br />If your roommate and friend says he doesn't resent you, I say take him at his word. And may I reiterate once again how much I love your name? <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-happy.gif" border="0">
<br />
<br />
 
J

JazzysMom

New member
I dont have much else to add except that it was & still is extremely difficult for me to accept help.

When Robert (my hubby) does laundry I protest because I feel I should be doing it yet I know in my heart that I cant get it done. I know its easier if he does it. He knows it needs to get done & he knows its easier if I do it.

That doesnt change how I see it/feel about it tho....

It actually sounds like you are a lucky gal. Until a time that its proven that your friend is not doing it for a good reason then enjoy & appreciate his efforts!
 
J

JazzysMom

New member
I dont have much else to add except that it was & still is extremely difficult for me to accept help.

When Robert (my hubby) does laundry I protest because I feel I should be doing it yet I know in my heart that I cant get it done. I know its easier if he does it. He knows it needs to get done & he knows its easier if I do it.

That doesnt change how I see it/feel about it tho....

It actually sounds like you are a lucky gal. Until a time that its proven that your friend is not doing it for a good reason then enjoy & appreciate his efforts!
 
J

JazzysMom

New member
I dont have much else to add except that it was & still is extremely difficult for me to accept help.

When Robert (my hubby) does laundry I protest because I feel I should be doing it yet I know in my heart that I cant get it done. I know its easier if he does it. He knows it needs to get done & he knows its easier if I do it.

That doesnt change how I see it/feel about it tho....

It actually sounds like you are a lucky gal. Until a time that its proven that your friend is not doing it for a good reason then enjoy & appreciate his efforts!
 
J

JazzysMom

New member
I dont have much else to add except that it was & still is extremely difficult for me to accept help.

When Robert (my hubby) does laundry I protest because I feel I should be doing it yet I know in my heart that I cant get it done. I know its easier if he does it. He knows it needs to get done & he knows its easier if I do it.

That doesnt change how I see it/feel about it tho....

It actually sounds like you are a lucky gal. Until a time that its proven that your friend is not doing it for a good reason then enjoy & appreciate his efforts!
 
J

JazzysMom

New member
I dont have much else to add except that it was & still is extremely difficult for me to accept help.
<br />
<br />When Robert (my hubby) does laundry I protest because I feel I should be doing it yet I know in my heart that I cant get it done. I know its easier if he does it. He knows it needs to get done & he knows its easier if I do it.
<br />
<br />That doesnt change how I see it/feel about it tho....
<br />
<br />It actually sounds like you are a lucky gal. Until a time that its proven that your friend is not doing it for a good reason then enjoy & appreciate his efforts!
 
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